Anyway, the thought went like this (hit it): what if you modeled your life after the concept of “no waste”? I had that phrase in my head and was really only focusing on sustainability and the natural environment. But as I thought about life, I thought “no waste” could apply to the way I live life. Here are the levels of this mantra that I can see (so far):

• Environmental- This one seems obvious but to really lessen the negative impact of my life on the world around me.
• Resources- Try not to waste anything (food, money, energy, breaths, etc.).
• Perception- Not every idea or goal will be successful but “no waste” means thinking of them as successes in the sense that I’ve learned something from them.
• Music- Working on refining the art and becoming more lean and more mean(ingful) with my songwriting, guitar playing and singing.

Also, stay tuned for a very special and possibly unflattering video documentary on yours truly! You may even get to see my terrible poison oak rash!

When I decided to be a musician, I don’t think I was fully prepared for the kind of rejection I would face on a daily basis. And before we go any further, let’s be clear that just because someone is occasionally passed over, that does not degrade there skill, talent or worth. That’s a common misconception and a dangerous one for anyone who is pursuing an art.

Truth be told, I thought becoming a musician was going to be “easy”. How naive. I thought, at worst, I’d cut my teeth for a few years but still be able to support myself full-time and be comfortable. Needless to say, that was my biggest mistake. Three years later and I catch myself thinking that I haven’t progressed at all and that I’m still fighting for the same shows, desiring for acceptance from the same people and still working to prove myself to an audience that really couldn’t care that I’ve sacrificed a huge portion of my life to music.

Obviously, that’s a bit extreme- but the sentiment is there. In fact earlier this week, I was sent an email essentially saying that the annual gig I’ve played for the past two years and I have always felt a vest interested in has decided to pass on me as a performer. While frustrating, I understand that nothing is a guaranteed. And instead of getting angry, I’ve decided to work harder.

But I wonder what it’s like for people who rise to meteoric heights in industries based on mass acceptance without encountering a good deal of resistance. Reject develops character and resolve. It reinforces the will power that a person already has to stand up every night and be judged by people who know nothing about you. Ironically, Bitter and jealous musicians say things like, “They don’t deserve fame because they didn’t have to go through the club scene to get to where they are.” While I don’t subscribe to that thought, there is definitely a ring of truth in that statement, at least in terms of working through the struggle of being a musician.

I don’t want to discount the struggles people have whether they are better off than I am or not. But personally, I’m glad to face rejection and sometimes, I welcome it as a galvanizing tool in life. It’s not only natural, but it is essential for developing into a well-rounded person. Anyone who doesn’t face rejection on a regular basis needs to put themselves into situations where they will. Besides, it makes the successes all the more sweet.

Ode to a Focus

Goodbye Focus. You were always so good to me and without you, I would have never gotten to where I am today (literally). Thank you for all of the good times, for never failing me when I needed you and for never causing me too much trouble in terms of maintenance and upkeep. We all have our flaws- yours included a broken rear window, a key lodged in the trunk keyhole, a malfunctioning A/C system and all sorts of leaks and wear and tear. You always looked young and hip, despite having a few miles on you before I got you. Lord knows I put on my fair share of miles after I got you. As for me, I wasn’t the best to you. I should have washed you more. I should have paid better attention when you needed more oil or fluids. It took me two months to replace one of your windshield wipers and looking back on it now, I wish I had taken you for a few more joy rides. You never complained that I pounded on the dashboard when the mp3 player I installed wasn’t working. You never complained when I drove home from the gym at work without taking a shower first. You had all sorts of beverages spilled on your floor mats and yet, you were always so graceful about it. When we moved to Normal Heights together, you got picked on more than ever. I feel responsible for how badly you were treated out there every night but you stood strong and resolute. In fact, you wore those marks like proud battle scars. So I take consolation in the fact that we both loved each other for who we were.  I hope you also take consolation that I got a car dealer to buy you for $800 less than what I bought you for in 2004 which was a ridiculous deal. I know you’ll be going to greener pastures (or as they call them, “wholesale dealers”) in a few days and I hope you can forgive me for not seeing you to your end. If I had my way, I would have. But the way things were going at the negotiating table made it almost impossible to leave with both of you. I can only hope that your next friend treats you better than I treated you because I know you’ll treat them right.

I’ll never forget your beautiful heart and soul and all of our adventures together. I hope that we meet again someday (but hopefully not in some kind of collision). Maybe then, we can go to the beach or drive through the mountains one last time.

You will be missed. Gone but not forgotten. Always in my heart. Goodbye my friend.

2001 Ford Focus, April 2004- May 2011

Being in Hawaii has been a great experience. It’s the first time I’ve been here and probably won’t be the last. It’s nice to have a real sense of rest and relaxation (whereas most of the time, I’m backpacking through some mountain range, sleeping on the ground and peeing in the woods). Taking in the natural beauty of the sunrise early in the morning has given me a whole new perspective on life, living and enjoying myself. Not necessarily a life-changing moment, but sure-as-hell memories that I will recall for the rest of my life.

That being said, I miss everyone back on the mainland. I’ll see you all soon! But until then, here’s a little taste of 6:22am on the North Shore in Oahu, HI.